screenwriting two

INT. BEDROOM - DAY

JULIA and KAITLYN are sitting on a bed gossiping and squealing. They're whispering and are clearly giddy over what was just said. The two begin laughing.

JuLIA

I can't believe he finally asked you out!

KAITLYN

I know! It's tomorrow too I have no time to get ready.

mom

(yells)

JULIA! Can you go run to the store quickly and pick up some more cranberry sauce?

Julia

OK, you wait here, and after I get back from the store I'll pick out an outfit and everything for you.

INT. KITCHEN - DAY

JULIA runs down the stairs and approaches her mom.

JULIA

CHRIS ate another whole can?

MOM

Yes, I don't know what to do with him! It's all he's been eating for the past two weeks.

JULIA

Alright. I'll go now.

INT./EXT. FRONT HALL - DAY

JULIA grabs her bag and keys off a table near the front door and runs outside. She then waves to CHRIS who is bike riding.

JULIA

Hey kiddo. You really ate another whole jar of the red stuff?

(smilingly)

CHRIS

Yep!

JULIA smiles and walks to her car. She opens the driver's door and sits inside. She ignites her car and glances back through the back window. She pulls back until she hears a loud scream andshe immediately stops the car. She opens the door to see CHRIS' bike rolling down the sidewalk.

INT. KITCHEN - DAY

It's three months later. JULIA is sitting nervously in a chair, biting her nails and playing with her feet. Her AUNT JANE is cooking Thanksgiving dinner.

JULIA

AUNT JANE?

aunt jane

Yes?

JULIA

I haven't really spoken to KAITLYN since, uhm, it happened.

AUNT JANE

Why do you think that is?

JULIA

She thinks I'm a murderer.

(thinking, pause)

I wouldn't even speak to me.

AUNT JANE

Honey, I think she knows you're not a murderer. I think she just misses your brother, and she needs some one to blame.

JULIA

I miss him too.

AUNT JANE

She probably knows that too. I mean think about it for a second sweetie. She wants to be able to take out her frustration somehow, and if she takes a second to think about how this might be even harder on you then it would be difficult for her to take it out on you.

(pause)

Has she even attempted to start speaking to you?

JULIA

No.

AUNT JANE

Give it time, she'll come around. You are sisters, after all.

JULIA nods and looks down at her hands.

INT./EXT. KITCHEN - NIGHT

JULIA walks into the kitchen as KAITLYN is picking up a dish of mixed vegetables. The two look at each other uncomfortably until KAITLYN walks out of the kitchen herself. Julia looks at the kitchen counter to see what is left to bring to the table and sees that only the cranberry sauce is left. JULIA freezes and stares at the bowl, as if debating picking it up or not. KAITLYN walks into the room and stops dead in her tracks when she sees JULIA and what she is staring at. KAITLYN slowly walks to the bowl herself and places one hand on the side. She then gestures to JULIA to come pick up the other side. Julia walks slowly towards the bowl, not looking away from it for a moment. Once she reaches the bowl she looks up at her sister, and KAITLYN gives a small smile. The two then carry the bowl out of the kitchen together.

I got a lot of great and really helpful feedback on this script today. I think the best suggestion I was given was to change the second to last scene with Aunt Jane around a little. It would start off with Kaitlyn walking into the kitchen as Julia and Aunt Jane are preparing the dishes to get ready to be taken outside. Julia and Kaitlyn would have this awkward tension between them for a moment, and then Kaitlyn picks up some dishes and goes outside. Aunt Jane would be watching the whole encounter between the two knowingly, and once Kaitlyn leaves the room Julia would start off the conversation with Aunt Jane about how she no longer speaks to Kaitlyn. I love starting that scene like this because it really allows another peak at that tension between the sisters even before the final scene. Another idea of shooting the last scene with multiple endings (Julia begins to pick up the bowl and Kaitlyn stops her, Julia and Kaitlyn both refrain from picking up the bowl but Aunt Jane comes and picks it up, etc.) is helpful because after seeing all the different possible ways in film it would definitely be easier to pick the best one. I'm genuinely excited for rewriting, filming, and seeing the end product.